April Showers…bring May Weddings.

Wedding Season has arrived…and that means time to pull out your credit cards, because so has shower season!

(Thanks Emily for the Cute Card Link-You always know the best stationary sites!)
Showers can be fun if done right. When I was younger I used to love playing all the silly games, taking the “How well do you know the bride/groom?” quiz and watching the bride open up he new paper towel holder with a surprised look on her face…you know that “OMG…I’ve always wanted one of these! I can’t believe you picked it out for me…wait…I told you to buy it for me!” These days I’m more of a Bitter Betty. Unless there are mimosas and other single girls in the mid to late 20’s around, I’m easily bored.


My little bro’s wedding is sneaking up on me (and my waistline), and I was reminded of how close we’re getting to it a few weeks ago while I was in Lexvegas at my sister-in-law-to-be’s party. The shower was very traditional (games and all) and was at her mom’s home with mostly her family and friends. I know that things aren’t about me…but as we took the “quiz” I was reminded of a few key things that had my heart in my chest: my brother dated her for 9 months prior to getting engaged, she is having 8 bride’s maids (and didn’t invite me) and that her friends were going to invite me to the bachelorette party until they “ran out of stamps”. My feelings were crushed. Not to mention that my killer “bridal honeymoon bag” gift was copied by someone at an earlier shower.

I tried to be a good sis and dust it off, so when they asked for volunteers for the next top secret shower game I volunteered. Big Mistake. HUGE. It was the dreaded toilet paper bridal game. I HATE that game. Ugh.

I still tried to be positive and I knew I had an edge. For starters, I had on a strapless dress that would be easily transformed into the perfect dress, not to mention I’ve done this about a gazillion times!
My team and I were doing great. My dress was going to kick the other two girls bootys and they could take their TP dresses and…well you get the point. That was until I looked over and found that the other 2 teams had done a model swap!!! EEEEKKK!

At the end of the extravaganza, I was the only adult in a TP bridal dress…not to mention that at the rate I’m going, they will be in a real bridal dress before me!

Clearly, I should have won! But I didn’t!!!

She totally played favorites and picked the flower girl! Who knew I’d loose to a six year old?

PS- I have removed the little girl’s faces because I was asked to by the mother of the child.

***Note to new readers: I poke fun at myself in my blog. I love my brother, and wish him the best in his marriage. This is not a stab at my sister-in-law-to-be or her family. The shower was very nice and I appreciate them inviting me to participate in the festivities.

***In “real life” I could give a rat’s ass if I won the TP contest or not! I only say this because others feel the need to think that I sincerely care that I lost. Seriously.


9 responses to “April Showers…bring May Weddings.

  1. Jamie Lovely

    hahaha this is hilarious.

    i’m really not a fan of showers, babies or weddings. i think it is the games. you are brave for participating! haha

  2. the stationary is great! and your a cute toilet paper bride

  3. You know those are Mary Ellen Fortney’s designs, dont you???? Can’t wait to see you!

  4. You look hot! Can’t wait to see you (if you actually make it home!)!

  5. You totally got the win stolen. I hope you threw a gigantic fit. Seriously though, I’m with you on the whole idea of showers. I have one coming up at the end of the month and I’m already thinking… ugh.

  6. One day your bro and future sister-in-law will mature and realize the true value of family. She doesn’t realize that she will probably never talk to 6 or the 8 brides maids ever again within a year of their wedding. You will be there forever and one day they will look back and regret their decision. I know your feelings are hurt but hang in there!

  7. the guest blog will be delayed. however, i will say that:
    a. you are freaking hilarious.
    b. i am so sorry that you were forced to play toilet paper brides, since no one has ever had even a little bit of fun playing that game, and also because it is a waste of good toilet paper.
    c. people who have children are supposed to teach them life lessons, like do unto others as you would have them do unto you, and (the standard) if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. which means they have to have learned that themselves at one point or another.
    d. i wish you would write a book about your life
    e. they don’t know you.
    f. i love you.

    – tina

  8. Sara- This is Meredith…why did I have to use my aol screen name?? Weird.

    1- If I were you, I would publish Stupid Stacy’s emails to you all over this blog. She is ridiculus and comical and everyone would love it. Come on?? Who believes she couldn’t splurge on a .41 cent stamp to get you an invitation. You, being the best maid of honor ever, would never have let such a small detail go by unfinished.
    2- I might have published this twice because I pushed publish, but I don’t think I did…hmmm.
    3- You definitely won the tp bride dress contest. You look beautiful as always, as do the little girls, and that’s that.
    4- Stupid Stacy needs to get over herself because she clearly doesn’t know one thing about you. If she did, she would know what a beautiful person you are inside and out, and if anything, you have done nothing but try to be supportive of Amy and John.
    5. Do you love how I am referring to her as Stupid Stacy–kind of like a Garbage Pail Kid kind of name. Like Trashy Traci and Vomit Vanessa.
    5.Tell Tina I miss her–I saw her at the movie and the mall but I’m always coming and she’s going or vice versa. I miss her.
    6. I can’t wait to see you in a couple weeks…YAY!!

  9. Pingback: My Favorite Things: ME! « Not Your Plain Jane

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