November by the Numbers

I can’t believe I’ve completed NoBloPoMo! I never thought this day would come. Thank the Lord it did.

I guess the only thing that this NBPM proves is that if you throw enough shit up on a wall, some of it’s bound to stick. I’m sorry that I fed y’all some seriously bad material. It’s so hard to be creative and give that kind of time up on a daily basis. I admire all of you who did. Just so you know, just because I didn’t get around to commenting daily, doesn’t mean that I didn’t read!

My life has been so crazy this month. I guess the best way to describe it, is to count it down in numbers, one of my all time favorite posts.

30- Posts and days to do it in. 

1- New site address! Thanks so much for all of you who have followed me! It means so much! x

176- Comments. You are the best readers ever! It’s so nice to know that there are people out there.

5- The number of posts started but never made it out of draft form this month.

3- The number of post ideas stolen borrowed from other bloggers. Thanks Brandy, Brookem and Jacqueline.

4- The date that America elected Barack Obama President.

12- Highest number of miles ran so far. 

6- The number of days left until my half marathon!

3154- The amount of miles driven for work this month. Ugh.

5- The number of dates I’ve had with the new boy.

7- The number of dogs at my parents house for Thanksgiving! Ugh. I love dogs and all, but it was a bit much.

26- The number of days until Christmas!

What are your numbers for November?

Just because I’m busy…

found here

I’ve been so swamped lately, and the next month or so is going to be so stinkin’ busy with work, holidays, personal stuff, etc. I feel like I need to give advanced warning with this.

Don’t worry, I still love you. Promise.

x

I’m almost done!

With Nablopomo! YES!!!!!!!!!!!

I wish I had more to say. But I need to get off the computer and go see my family.

Hope you’re all enjoying Black Friday!

I promise to have a more exciting post tomorrow.

A Tale of Two Turkeys

I know that on Thanksgiving I should be letting you all know all of the things that I’m thankful for. There are a ton of them, and I’ll be sure to let you know all about them some day soon. But it wouldn’t be fair for me to let this day go by and not share with you the “Tale of Two Turkeys”.

Once upon a time, in a far off land known as Kentucky, there was a fun spirited girl named SJ. She was madly in love with a shitty foolish boy named V, regardless of the fact that he had put her on a roller coaster ride for 5 long years. When their tumultuous love finally came to an end, they were living together in a small one bedroom apartment. Although their relationship came to an end, there were still a few more weeks to go in their lease and they stayed living together. V decided he would be the one to move out, leaving SJ to live alone in their apartment.

It was so hard for SJ continue to live in the same space she once shared with her long time love. Like many men, V was not very diligent when it came to packing his belongings and left many loose ends behind. Every time SJ would open the closet, she would see the coats he left behind. They still smell like him and had receipts in the pockets from dates they’d had in the past. When she went to get the mail, his name could be found on credit card offers and magazines. His protein shakes were in the cupboard next to the flour and…the 13 lb. frozen turkey V’s work had given him for Thanksgiving was right next to her peppermint ice cream, monopolizing freezer space. He was everywhere she turned, despite the fact that he’d been gone for weeks.

V had only moved about a mile down the road and was living in a house with a boy named Freddie. Freddie was good friends with both SJ and V, and was one of SJ’s employees! This made things even harder than you can imagine for her broken heart.

One day at work, SJ was caught off guard by a phone call from V, “Jane, I need you to get my coats and my mail and bring it to Freddie. That stuffs been laying around your house too long.”

SJ was caught off guard by his demands and felt so nauseous she thought that she was going to get sick all over her desk. How dare he call her at work and demand her return the stuff that he left behind?

While at home on  her lunch break SJ’s decided that she couldn’t let these emotions consume her life anymore. That’s when a light bulb went off in her head. DING! She decided to quit being sad and start getting even!

She grabbed the largest box that she could find and started filling it with his things, the coats he’d left in the hall closet, the t shirt that was behind the washer, the month’s worth of junk mail that had been littering the kitchen counter, the creatine powder that had been a waste of space in the pantry and last but not least, she topped the box off with the 13lb frozen turkey.

As she was taping the box up, she couldn’t help but grin from ear to ear. The only thing that could have made this moment any better would have been if she was able to see his face when he opened his final parting gift. She thought about wrapping it up as a house warming gift and enclosing a sweet note.

Dear douche V,

Thank you for finally getting out of my life for good. Hope to not hear from you.  Congrats on your new home.

x,

SJ

But after second thought, she decided that may cause him to open the gift right away.

SJ returned to work box in hand and passed off the goods to Freddie. She felt bad putting him in the middle of things, but she had no other choice.Freddie put the box in his trunk Friday afternoon, and gave it to V when he remembered on Sunday evening.

Yes, you read that right. The frozen turkey sat on top of all of his coats and mail, in the trunk of a car for 2 full days!

Monday morning, my store opened at 7:30 AM, at 7:31 AM the phone rang.

“Thanks for returning the turkey.”

SJ couldn’t hold her composure any longer…all she could do was laugh. It was the first sense of closure she had in her relationship. After years of putting up with his chicken shit, she’d finally give him the bird.

Happy Turkey Day!

I may not be here tomorrow…

because my family is driving me so insane I may shoot myself.

I don’t even have the energy to go into details about this because they have taken it all.

I wish I was exaggerating.

Stay tuned for tomorrow and a fabulous post about old flames and frozen turkeys….

Q&A Part 2: Guilty Pleasures

Loads of my questions had to do with my guilty pleasures.

Brandy wants to know: what beauty product I can’t live without. And in a similar question, Amanda asked me What beauty product do you feel naked without?

Brandy, I feel like there are so many products I can’t live without. Eeek. Thats a hard one. Once upon a time, I posted a few of my favorites here. I have a few other products that I can’t live without in the shower, like my Dove bar, Pureology shampoo/ conditioner, Venus razor (even if I get my hair cut more often than I use it). I also love J&J 24 hour moisture lotion. I swear by a skin care line called Villa Floriani. They used to use the products at a salon I worked at and I’ve been using them for the past 7 years. It’s not too expensive and it lasts forever. I know you more than likely just meant 1 or 2, but I’m not always so good with limits. Oh well.  As far as feeling naked Amanda, I feel naked without lipgloss. I don’t have a set favorite. I love too many to choose just one! (Again, the limit thing.)

Brandy also asked What is your Guilty Pleasure Snack:

I love to make homemade pizza rolls. I take crescent rolls, pizza sauce, cheese and pepperoni and roll it up in one big roll and bake it in the oven. Let cool for about 10 minutes and cut into slices. It’s pretty much delicious and I’m sure full of calories.

I’m also a sucker for premade cookies. Toll House chocolate/peanut butter cup. I eat about 3 uncooked before I get them all on the pan and in the oven.  

Brookem, my favorite ice cream is Graeter’s Peppermint. They only have it around the holidays.  This is another guilty pleasure snack! Sadly, there is no Graeters anywhere near me, they’re mostly just in Ohio and Kentucky.

Shopping is another one of my guilty pleasures. Brookem asked What is your favorite go to sexy outfit?

Well, my favorite shoes  (Not to Jamie) are for sure my CL’s pictured in the header of my blog. After I worked so hard for them, I was sad that they only went with a cocktail dress. Recently I have been pairing them with a pair of skinny jeans and a sassy silk tank. It makes me feel super sexy, and gives me a chance to wear my delicious heels way more often!

Jamie, as far as these shoes go…not any time soon! Which seriously breaks my heart.

That’s all for now! Happy Tuesday!

xxxo

Q&A Part 1: What’s in a Name?

Hi lovely readers! You asked, now I will do my best to answer.

Peter de Wolf asked: Do people typically call you Sara Jane, or just Sara?

My mom didn’t name me Sara Jane with the intent of using it as a double name. She just thought that people would call me Sara. Little did she know that as an adult I would move more and more South as time went on. The deeper South I go, to more and more people have double names. I actually have customers in South Carolina that call me Sara Jane, so that’s how I started signing off my emails and ordering my business cards. They think it makes me more Southern, and in turn more like-able.

The majority of my friends just call me Sara or some shortened form of my last name. I have a handful of friends that call me Jane and a few more that call me Sara Jane.

When I was a kid, I hated telling people my middle name. I thought that it was the most embarrassing old lady name ever. As an adult I’ve grown to embrace it.

Auburn Kat asked: Why did you start blogging?

I started blogging in June 2007. I had recently been hired by a new company and was going to eventually move to the Carolinas to work, but before I could settle, I had to endure a 5 month training program where I split my time between Philly, PA and Cary, NC. I was lucky to have made some friends along the way, but blogging was a way to keep up with the friends I had left in KY and OH.

At the time, I had no idea that there was a huge community of people that were out here! I had one real life friend that blogged and started reading the same ones that she did. I branched out and started finding more sites through others and that’s how I met all of you!

Amanda wants to know, When you’re feeling totally uninspired-what do you do, where do you go,who do you call, whichever…to get inspired?

Until Nablopomo, if I wasn’t inspired by anything, I just wouldn’t write. Period. But I’ve found that the more I write, the more inspired I am.

Most of the time inspiration comes to me in the car. I travel a lot for work and drive between 500-1000 miles/ week. Crazy, I know, but true. I get loads of time to think, listen to music, chat with my friends about mindless things. I guess that’s where I get most of my inspiration.

Jamie asked, What’s your favorite part about blogging?

Hands down, my favorite part of blogging is getting to know other writers who put their hearts into the computer day after day. They share their accomplishments, heartbreaks, random ideas, loves and hates with all of us. It’s exciting to feel so connected with people you may not really know, but you feel like there are days that you know them more than some of your real life friends. I think that one of my favorite posts sums it up best here. Thanks Brandy.

Letter to the Trail Police

Dear Stupid Biker in the Green Sweatshirt,

I hope you enjoyed your short bike ride this afternoon. The weather was brisk and perfect for fall outside activities. Although we were slightly distracted by your plumbers crack hanging out of your sweat pants, we are very aware that you yelled at us to pick up the water bottle we threw on the ground at mile marker 2. You must have been amazed by our beauty or hard of hearing because you clearly missed Erin telling you that we were not done running and would be back to get our water later.

You see, although you saw us at mile marker 2, we were really on our 6th mile out of 12 and scheduled to run by the water 2 more times! That water was what was supposed to keeping us going the 2nd half of our run. You can only imagine our dismay when we got back there to find no water! We wish we had seen you to punch you in the face thank you for cleaning up the trail, but sadly you and your crack were only out for a short ride.

Despite your plans to ruin our last long run together before our half marathon in 2 weeks, we were all still able to finish our 12 miles, so… IN YOUR FACE STUPID BIKER MAN!

Sincerely,

SJ, SAS and ET

AKA- The Big Sexy Runners

Cool as a Cucumber

That’s how I want to play things in life most of the time. Sadly with this boy, I’ve been more like a hot tamale. Wait…not in the bedroom, but as far as making time for him.

See, when we first met he was in lust at first sight. This is NOT an affect I have on men very often, so it was easy to play things cool. He asked me when he could take me to dinner this week to which I replied (as any cucumber would), “I’m a pretty busy girl…maybe Thursday?”.

Normal boys would be ok with that response and call me later in the week to make plans. His response was much different, “I can’t wait that long. How about tomorrow?”

Wow.

That’s all I could think. Since when did men decide to be so direct? This is not the normal texting from boys that I was used to. I couldn’t resist.

I had such an amazing time at dinner, I couldn’t play it cool when he asked for lunch plans…or when he asked to watch basketball with some of his friends on Tuesday night…

When Thursday rolled around, he remembered that I had told him originally that’s when we could go out. After our big sexy fancy first date, I told him that this week I wouldn’t go anywhere unless I could wear sweatpants and tennis shoes. We ended up staying in, eating frozen pizza, drinking wine and chatting.

The best part of it all is that I had just as much fun staying in as we did going out. But I’m having such a hard time playing it cool. I told him we couldn’t hang until Thursday and we had 3 other dates prior to Thursday! What is wrong with me???

Seriously.

But here is the catch. He’s out of town this weekend. And then I leave on Tuesday for a week to go home and see the family. There will be loads of non-date nights. (Reason #123 I need him to be able to text). This should give me a bit of time to remember how to play things cool. Right?

Be Careful What You Wish For

Remember when I said this about texting? I take it all back. Well maybe not all of it. But a sliver of it.

Typical scenario for a 20something boy: Boy meets girl. Girl gives number to boy. The next weekend, boy sends text to girl: WHAT ARE YOU DOING 2NITE? WANNA MEET UP?

I HATE this. This is not an exaggeration on my distastes. I think it’s the stupidest thing ever. If you really want to get to know me, pick up the phone at a normal hour and make plans.

End Rant.

New Boy, doesn’t text. I thought this was great at first…until I learned that he can’t send or recieve them due to a lost phone and waiting on a replacement. I don’t miss the late night booty text part of it. I miss the mid day, “Thinking of you” ones. I miss getting them, and I miss sending them.

There are so many things that you don’t always want to say over the phone. You don’t have the guts to say.

If I could text him right now…I’d let him know how much fun I had last night. That’s all the details you get for now…

Who and what would you text if you had the guts?